How to Have Realistic and Healthy Expectations of Yourself

Lizzie Weakley
2 min readOct 22, 2019

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While reaching perfection is a rosy prospect, it’s nothing more than a pipe dream. No one is without flaw, and until you make peace with this reality, you’ll exhaust yourself trying to meet unrealistic standards. If living a fulfilling and purpose-driven life is what you desire, setting sensible expectations is critical. Here’s some advice on how to calibrate unreasonably high expectations.

Divorce Yourself from Fear

Fear is a rotten liar, and he’ll best you in any duel that you’re courageous enough to brave. When fear wins, expectations rise. This is because fear-based thinking is the catalyst for raising the bar. Only when you conquer fear will you release yourself from impossible standards. Not surprisingly, this is easier said than done. When fear rears its ugly head, take some moments of quietude to focus on your breathing. In doing so, you’ll return to reality.

Assess Your Expectations

Are you longing to be the seemingly perfect virtuous woman from Proverbs 31? If so, who could blame you? She’s clever, independent, and confident, and everyone knows that these are the hallmarks of a worthy woman. If this notion rings true for you, it’s time to re-evaluate your expectations. Comparison is the thief of happiness, and drawing parallels between your life and someone else’s will inevitably breed disappointment. With that said, it’s prudent to create standards that are in keeping with your capabilities.

Set Your Values

Examining your morals is a surefire way to set realistic expectations. When you determine what’s most important to you, you’re inspired to live in service of the things you hold dearest. What’s more, your purpose becomes clearer. The journey to self-discovery is as precarious as it is rewarding. When stumbling blocks inevitably arise, don’t deviate from your path. As your values begin to uncover themselves, your expectations will align with reality.

Practice Positivity

The more you promote negativity, the harsher you treat yourself. When these destructive behaviors persist, they snowball into a whirlwind of self-sabotaging tendencies. Adopting an optimistic attitude will allow you to see the glass half full. As a result, you’ll learn to be kinder to yourself and settle on realistic standards.

By heeding the above advice, you’ll learn to set practical expectations of yourself. With practice and patience, you’ll soon discover how easy it is to lower your standards and lead a down-to-earth lifestyle.

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Lizzie Weakley
Lizzie Weakley

Written by Lizzie Weakley

Lizzie Weakley is a freelance writer from Columbus, Ohio. In her free time, she enjoys the outdoors and walks in the park with her husky Snowball

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